Sydney Banks very often talks about being Neutral. What is that?
We all make judgements. We do it all the time. It is how we navigate our lives in this physical realm. So, when Syd says “Be Neutral”, what is it he is saying. Is it that…
- Drop all our opinions
- Forsake all our judgements.
- Drop all our beliefs.
- Don’t make any choices.
- Don’t reveal to others what we really think and feel about the given situation.
- Be a fence sitter?
- Be secretive, sly and deceive?
I think Sydney meant that we should not have closed minds. We should not always think the same thoughts. Our Minds are very keen on Closure and will close any subject, deciding that its conclusion is absolutely correct. (even if it is not)
Every 7 weeks or so, every cell in your body changes. Cells have died, and new ones have taken their place. Every moment of every day the world changes in so many ways. There you sit, assuming that nothing for you ever will change. You will never feel or act differently. YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE FROZEN IN TIME, which will go on endlessly.
When someone offers you their opinion on something and it is very different from your own opinion there is this sudden urge to defend your position.
SUDDENLY it seems so important that they will be found wanting and you will be right.
Opinion is just judgment by another name.
What Syd means by being Neutral is not that you have an opinion (that is all fine and dandy) BUT you are passive about it.
It is NOT the opinion that harms you it is what you are prepared to do to insist that “YOUR OPINION” is the right opinion that causes;
- Hurt and pain to others
- Hostility
- Defensiveness
- Lies/deception
What if…
Everything you held true was, in fact, a big fat lie?
Not possible!! Everything that I believe is true, is 100% absolute truth.
Pilate’s jest when he spoke to Jesus was “and what is the truth?” The truth of anything is not so simple to define. What is held true by one man is easily dismissed as a lie by another man. We each hold a different key to the meaning of things.
MIND covers over lies (or things that fall short of its standards) by inventing circumstances (part fact, part fiction stories) that justify why it believes a lie is in fact the heart of the matter – a truism.
Self-deception.
Now the very clever among you will be saying, “That is all very well HICKMAN but your explanation is in fact a judgement of the person that you refer to. TOP MARKS – you are right, it is!!
The difference is that my action about their opinion is neutral. It is not for me to point out the error of everyone else’s opinions. It is for the other person to see their own self-deception and work on how they can avoid being like that.
The only person that I have control over is ME. I have no control over what other people do.
My best choice is to be the best version of me that I possibly can be by being flexible and gladly accepting the truth when I see it, and rejecting the lie when I discover it. Oh, Plus, when I am in error, I will say sorry and assure myself that I will try never to do such a thing again.
“You sound too good to be true!!!!”
Yes! I agree. When I fail, though, I will admit it and try again. When others fail, I will forgive them and ask them to try not to do it again.
Knowing right from wrong is part of intellectual discernment, but mainly we instinctively know what is disgusting and what is way above acceptable.
Don’t we!?
So, having an opinion is okay, but defending it is not?
That is roughly correct. State your opinion but don’t insist on others accepting it. They must come to their own understanding. An opinion stated firmly and fairly may sway the thoughts of others if they have time to peacefully reflect on what has been said.
Just as Syd said. Be Neutral. Consider what the truth might be.
Misunderstanding is in all things for all people.
